Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Old McDonald Had Some Overalls...

...Eeyi Eeyi Oh!

After searching unsuccessfully for overalls in a size 6, I finally wised up and remembered dear old ebay. For $8.25 we are the proud owners of a pair of barely used Osh Kosh overalls that fit M perfectly and have...dare I say it out loud...kept his hands off his nether regions for most of the day!

Now granted the poor child is trying his hardest to squeeze the be-jaysus out of his unit through the denim, but it is nothing compared what we have been dealing with and certainly won't allow for eau de penis smell on his fingertips. The only problem?? Now I need to check back on ebay for another pair of overalls because Mama does not want to have to wash these things every single day!

Anybody have a pair of boys' size 6 overalls they want to part with?!

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Thankful Sunday

Today I am thankful for something unconventional. Something most people would think me callous for if they weren't inclined to listen to the explanation following the words, 'today I am thankful for death.'

I was blessed to have some amazing great aunts in my life. These were the sisters of my maternal grandfather; he being a man I never met...a man whose own demons prevented him from being a father to my mother. Because of that, and because his wife (my maternal grandmother) had even bigger demons, my Mom was raised by and with these aunts. They filled the role of grandparent that was not sufficiently filled on either side of my family, and for that I am ever grateful.

My Aunt Peggy, whose given name was an elegant 'Evelyn Lucille,' was the youngest of the aunts and like a big sister to my Mom. She was tall, thin and striking. She loved nothing more than a good joke or a day shopping with her nieces. She was a load of fun to be around.

Peggy was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease. I imagine it was some time in my mid-teens. The decline was noticeable from the get-go and she had been severely disabled from her illness for at least the past 10 years. Two and a half years ago we thought the end was imminent and Peggy was put into a hospice facility. You normally hear about people going to hospice right at the end, but not Peggy. She stayed in that hospice facility for over two years until they downsized earlier this year due to the economy and my uncle Norman was forced to bring her home to their tiny apartment. We didn't thinks she would live much longer after he brought her home, but once again she proved us wrong and survived another four months.

I got the call this morning from their daughter that she had passed some time this morning. She had not had a morsel of food or drink for nearly two weeks, nor had she passed any urine during that time. It is astounding that a human body could sustain itself for that long. The hospice workers believed it was because her metabolism had slowed so greatly over the past couple of years that it required close to nothing to carry on its duties. For me, though, I think she held on all this time because she was waiting for a call from someone she loved Mom.

I won't go into all of the details as it would take pages to try and type, but because of various hurtful situations during my Mom's childhood and adulthood, she and Peggy have not talked in nearly 15 years. I had carried the burden of this for too long and have just recently been able to unload my worries over it for the most part. I think it sucks that my Mom could not be the bigger person and called my aunt. I tried desperately through the years to arrange it or get it her to at least write a letter, but it was not to be. I tried one last time when I first heard a week ago that the end was near and my Mother told me that she would not call and that she knew I didn't understand. Yep. You're right. I don't.

So while I am sad for the strong feeling I have that Peggy has been waiting these past couple of years for my mother to contact her, I am very thankful that she does not have to wait any longer. No one should have to live the end of their life the way Peggy did. For such a once-vibrant woman, this was cruel and undignified.

Peggy, I love you, and I am so happy you are no longer suffering. Tell your sisters, Mimi and Hazel, that I miss them every single day. Thank you all for being so special to me. I have always felt the presence of Mimi & Hazel watching over me and my boys and I have no doubt I will feel your presence too.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

If I Had A Nickel...

...for every time I said, 'M, don't touch your penis,' 'hands out,' or 'M, get your hands out of your mouth,' I'd be a kazillionaire.

Seriously, folks. We have a penis problem 'round here, and it's rather stinky.

My child is so obsessed with his unit that you will find him probably 50 minutes out of each hour with one hand down his pants and one in his mouth. Have you ever seen a horse crib? It's the ultimate endorphin-high. I think my M has started his own version of cribbing with his new habit. It's like there is some imaginary string connecting the one hand down the pants to the other hand in the mouth. The two work in cahoots with one another except when the mouth is otherwise occupied with food-eating or a therapeutic chewy.

It really stinks (no pun intended) to be grossed out by your own kid, but honestly, his hands smell awful and I can only wash them so much. The dance we do after a session on the potty is something to behold. You try helping your nearly-six-year-old get from the potty to the sink without his hands touching you. It is becoming an art, no doubt. I joked with the other half that we could add a new, disgusting jelly belly flavor to the Harry Potter collection. Have you ever tasted snot, vomit or ear wax? I'm betting 'penis' would be the worst of the lot.

All joking aside, (was I joking??), there is likely a biomedical cause beneath all of this. M has battled yeast overgrowth issues in the past and is probably dealing with one now. DAN! doctors believe that kids with autism have more of an imbalance of bacteria, yeast, etc. in their guts that can lead to a variety of 'unsavory' behaviors. They believe in healing an autistic child from within, thus lots of vitamin supplements, dietary changes, antibiotics, anti-fungals, steroids and potentially even chelation. There is not a one-size-fits-all treatment plan for our kiddos and the plan of attack is constantly changing. Blood tests, urine tests, stool tests and instinct all come into play. We finally were able to successfully get a stool sample from M a few days ago that was promptly whisked away by the blissfully unaware FedEx man to the lab. I'll report back on the findings as soon as we get them.

Meanwhile, I finally found a pair of used overalls on ebay (because NO ONE has long overalls for sale right now) that should arrive any day. We're going to see if wearing overalls with a shirt ON TOP will help curb the now-obsessive, penis-grabbing habit. Wish us luck!

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Thankful Sunday

Today I am thankful for:

-My husband on his 35th birthday (AKA 'Flag Day,' or 'The most under appreciated holiday')

-Karma and knowing that it really can come back to you.

-A second chance to appreciate the sweet, gentleness of my dog, Daisy.

-The kindness of strangers

-The stillness of a coastside, Sunday morning even when M doesn't want to ride horses at the Square Peg ranch.

-List formats

Happy Sunday!

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Remember To Take Care Of YOU!

Today I'm over at Hopeful Parents. I will be the first to say this is not my best contribution as today I am realizing the effects of too many beers last night. I am such a lightweight!

Monday, June 1, 2009

Come On! Everyone's Doing it!

Okay, so not everyone, but three, whole people are not afraid to admit to the world that they are followers of 'This Is My New Normal.'
Why not join the bandwagon? Pretend you're a member of a really cool, exclusive club. Pretend I give you free crap. (pretend, okay?)

I mean, comedians don't become comedians so that they can tell jokes to themselves, do they? Heck no! They want an audience!

So if you're reading, fess up and let me know!